Pizza Club Loves Children

Not quite as much as NAMBLA loves children, and more as an idea than an actuality. Our most recent excursion was to Fireside Pizza in Richfield, and it should have been a hint that in a review, the place was lambasted for operating a business without a changing table. This is the reason why: there were so many screaming children, it could only have been because all of them had shit their pants, and without a changing table, their parents had no other option than to let their spawn sit in their own feces and continually interrupt our most special monthly event. Pizza Club however persevered, and followed through on our goals.

Fireside Pizza, was in most regards, decent Pizza. Reasonable portions of toppings, cheese, and sauce fell on to this thin crusted circle. The problem was, and may continue to be going forward: we’ve eaten at a lot of different places, and comparing them to the best establishments, how many can stack up? Not everyone can be the best, but if this is as far as your bicycle could pedal you, it would probably be the best you knew. Certainly everything appeared to be home made, and was put together with care and consideration. I didn’t get any significant flavor from the toppings, and the sauce as well, didn’t wow me. It was Pizza, and it wasn’t bad, but I’m not sure it could be called ‘good.’ I believe the consensus as we were leaving came down to: “that was alright.” I wouldn’t refuse to eat there ever again, but I couldn’t make a point of going back; there was nothing that we got there that you can’t get somewhere else better and cheaper.

The biggest issues with the evening were fairly minor. Our waitress described the large, as a Pizza for four people. I don’t know what kind of skinny bitches she hangs out with, but this was very much wrong. We ordered one large, and one small, and it was devoured by five people in short order. As is tradition, we ordered Garlic Cheese Bread, or as close to that description as we can find in the establishment that we’re in. It was as such, Garlic Cheese Bread, though it was heavy on cheese and bread, and short on garlic. The biggest Pizza Club foul though, would have to be the sauce. As best I could tell, it was tomato paste, with a little bit of Prego mixed in for seasoning. A very little bit.

All in all, Fireside Pizza wasn’t bad, and it could probably, on a different day, be good. Maybe with different toppings, and a little more spice in the sauce, and it would be quite good. Also, seriously consider getting a changing table, because half your patrons have shitty diapers, and only some of them can take care of it themselves.

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